Credit: Llewellyn's Witches Calendar

Imbolc. We Pagans and Wiccans that follow the traditional Wheel of the Year typically learn at the beginning of our studies that Imbolc heralds the start of spring, the first stirrings of the Earth after the long lonely winter has passed….

Really??

I live on the Canadian prairies. As I’m writing this, at around 800 pm CST, it’s very dark outside…the light is slowly starting to return, but at such a snail’s pace that it is barely noticeable unless you closely track it. We, and several of the northern US states, recently had a dump of snow, or a “blizzard” to the states that experience this as unusual activity (to us, this is relatively normal..), so it looks more like Yule than spring out there. The snow is still gently falling against the blackness as I write. It frusterates me. I admit it. I’m not a winter person. I’m a summer girl. I love the ocean, and the bright sun, and the sand…. I long for summer. I long for spring. I long for the green grass and leaves.

Imbolc promises it’s coming. As an educated woman who has seen 31 turns of the Wheel, I “know” that it’s coming. I know spring will come again, followed by summer. I know that the trees won’t stay barren forever and that the leaves will somehow, miraculously, burst from the branches that look like lifeless twigs within the weeks to come. I know that the sun will somehow grow stronger and melt all of the huge snowdrifts. That nature will somehow hear some soundless signal that will allow the temperatures to rise from the minuses to the pluses again.

I often wonder how it all works. How nature knows. How Mother Nature doesn’t get confused and “Forget” that spring is supposed to come, and leave us with endless winter. Sometimes, in my child’s heart, I fear that that might happen. Or, with that same childish wishing heart, I hope that Mother Nature will forget that winter is supposed to come, and leave us with endless summer.

Oh, I’m educated. I went to school, all the way through to University. I was never a sciences or maths person (blech..I deeply respect them, and those that are good at them, but as someone with Dyscalculia, the maths and sciences were always a huge stumbling block for me and I never enjoyed them as a result.), but I know the basics of the environment, of Biology, of the “why’s”.

But, I think one of the wonders of being Pagan is that we retain that same awe and wonder about the seasons, about the processes of life, the same respect and awknowledgement that the life processes around and within us are all great mysteries, and part of The Great Mystery,that our ancesestors did. I’m not saying that this is exclusive to the Earth-centered religions, but us Pagans and our sisters and brothers that follow the Earth-centered paths have a unique perspective of the cycles of life. We don’t just see them as created by Deity…we see them AS Deity Itself. Goddess didn’t just make the seasons..She IS the seasons. Pagans today aim to view the seasons and the natural world with the same wonder and awe as the first people did when the viewed a lightening storm in all its glory, or the ocean pounding the shore, or a snowstorm blanketing the earth. The seasons changing, or a baby’s development in the womb and first breath, or the bird’s ability to soar to incredible heights, is no less miraculous today because we can scientifically explain them;all that science does is explain the mechanics. The mechanics still happen, and the miracles still unfold within.

But back to Imbolc.I promise it all ties in.

I think that those of us that live in climates where we might not “see” the changes of spring as early or as dramatically as other places, which includes those where the seasons might not be as marked as they are in my climate, might question if the lessons of Imbolc really apply to us. I promise you, they really can.

Imbolc translated means “Fire in the belly” : the beginning of new life. The start of something. Catalyst, ignition, conception, a seed. Imbolc to the Celts is also the celebration of the Great Goddess Brighid, She who is Healer,Muse, Poetess, Smith, Great Mother. Imbolc is the seed: the start of something. The seed isn’t always visible. We can’t always see what is going on far beneath the earth, the stirrings of what is beginning. When a child is first conceived, most don’t know right away that a great change is happening. When a great idea or business plan is first conceived, a great deal of work lies ahead: the idea might just be a thought crossing someone’s mind. All of the inventions and progression we see today started with one idea; often an idea that others might have called crazy or impossible. It all seems impossible at first. The idea of spring coming out of a cold, snowy winter;colorful flowers, green trees, balmy breezes, springing out of a snowy, cold, barren land would seem ridiculous to someone that had never heard or seen the concept.

Gardners understand this. Giant, ugly bulbs that look like onions will bloom into e beautiful, blooming rose bushes. Seeds in seemingly gross,smelly manure will burst into vegetables. What is seemingly meaningless or unseen will become seen and transformed.

THAT’S the message of Imbolc. We, too, have the chance to be transformed. It will take some belief on our part. We have to start moving as the Earth does. Put away our “big people” logic and over-thinking for awhile and just give over to the cycles. What is unseen now that we wish to bloom in the coming spring? What do we wish to plant? No matter what we do, we are planting something. If we are thinking negatively…and we’ve all been there…i.e. “I will never get out of debt” , “I will never get a good job”, “That’s just notpossible”"…we’re planting those seeds of doubt, that will grow to full-grown weeds that will overgrow, take over, crowd and choke our goals before we can even plant them in our garden. What to do? Go through and pull them at the root. When they threaten to take over, repeat to yourself, “I’m planting the seeds of positivity”. The more you say positive things to yourself, the more your brain starts to be retrained.

Picture that garden in your mind, now nicely pruned of the weeds and self-doubt. The doubts will still come, so don’t worry about them. Just keep your pruning shears at the ready and pluck them when they come ’round; if you catch them right away, they won’t take root. Every garden gets some.

Ok..now..what do you want to plant? How’s the soil looking? Do you need to water your garden (mind)? Try doing some meditation. Five minutes a day. That’s it. Stand outside for five minutes. Look at the moon or the sun, and breathe in nature, taking in the elements, talk to the Goddess and God (in your head our out loud, as you can). Or, if you prefer indoors, sit at your altar or sacred space, and just sit and drink in the presence.

Think of what you want to plant this season. Invision what you want to bloom. What you want to nurture throughout the seasons this Wheel. It might change. Don’t have heart failure if it does..just picture what you want for now, and it will grow with you. Plant the seed, and nurture it every day in your meditation. Water it. Keep the area clean. Talk to your seed. Nuture it with positive thoughts.

No matter what your climate, no matter how unbelievable it might seem that spring is on its’ way…somewhere…deep inside….your spirit knows. Water that hope. Keep it going. The snow might be on the outside, but the seed is stirring deep within the Earth.

(image is freeware from internet, please contact me if you know of credit)

BLESSED SAMHAIN/CALAN GAEF to all of my dear friends that celebrate it. I have so much to be thankful for this harvest, and you are all included in those thanks! May your new year be blessed by the Lord and Lady with brilliance and abundance!!

For all celebrating, have a safe and happy Halloween!

Namaste.

Upon Each Samhain

When you come I sense your presence
I put my hand out in the air
A moment, then, we stand united
Palm to palm while waiting there.
I miss you most upon each Samhain
When the boundary turns to sheer
We share these hours until the dawning
Then bid farewell until next year.

….I love my new Twitter account, but I’m not going to allow my two-second tweets to take over my blog. This week, I’ve just been very reflective and “inward” to the point where writing is difficult. But I shall try.

The veil is thinning the more we move towards Samhain. I can feel autumn coming all around me, and the physical signs are here; the other day when I went for a walk, the leaves were crunching under my feet, and were beautiful colors of gold and burnished auburn. The wind is starting to blow cooler, the night temperatures are dipping. We had a rare late summer here. I live on the Canadian prairies, so winter often comes very early here, with a brief fall in between. It’s never long enough for me. I’m a summer girl through and through, but I do love the fall; I love the colors, the wind, the falling leaves, sweaters, anything pumpkin..but it’s always over too quickly, and the winter snow sometimes is with us before Samhain (everyone here remembers at least one Halloween where their costume had to be worn over a snowsuit, and they are typically purchased to accomodate one.). So, the fall is brief.

But I think that, like all things in nature, there’s a lesson to be learned from this.

I remember when I had the good fortune to go to the Mayan Riviera in Mexico, one January years ago. Every day I was there, I kept thinking of how I had to make it last. How when I got home, it was going to be -30 Temps with snowbanks up to my hips. When I lay in a hammock on the most beautiful beach I’d ever seen, I was dreading the fact that in a couple more days I would be heading back home, back to university, my practicum and my part-time job. Back to stress. Back to “real life”.

The problem is that the whole time I wasn’t fully there. I was somewhere else. Instead of enjoying the moment, I kept thinking about what would happen when it ended.

Being someone that struggles with anxiety disorder, that is par for the course with the way my mind works. Or, rather, wants to work.

But am I at the mercy of that? No. Wicca has helped me to see that there are ways to change your thinking. Dion Fortune defined magick as the act of changing your consciousness at will. That’s where the magick starts; within our thinking. The law of attraction isn’t some fancy, new agey concept that will cost you hundreds, or even thousands, of dollars in books, CD’s, meditation tapes, and seminars; those things can help, but when you want to make real magick, you can start right now. Change your outlook, change your thinking..even if it’s one thought a day.

A fellow Priestess and dearfriend of mine taught me the following trick; be in the moment. Right in the moment. Don’t think even a second ahead. Just now.

Go ahead, try it. I’ll wait.

Not easy,is it? I try to do this at least once a day. Think only of NOW. That’s it. You’ll be surprised how your perception will shift. I’m going to keep trying, too; when I look at the changing leaves and feel the cold,crisp wind blowing, I’m going to think of autumn and not the winter to come. It may be brief, but it’s arguably approaching the most sacred time of year for Witches, when the veil is thinnest, when the living and the dead can almost touch hands , when time and space doesn’t exist…a time of such sensitivity that even the Muggles can feel it. I love Samhain, it’s my favorite sabbat and time of the year, and I’m going to try to enjoy that window in time, before it is frosted with ice and snow.

Namaste, be well!

..from my last post, as my brain does not appear to wish to be quiet at any point. I’m having the urge to write, and honoring it, as well as enjoying the free-flow of my thoughts into the written word, as it isn’t always so simple.

A little more thoughts on Descent and Mabon, as I dream out loud..

My dreams are becoming so very vivid lately that I’m not sleeping…I’m (astral) travelling. This time of year is very poignant for me and I can feel the veil thinning as surely as I can feel my pulse; it’s a fact, it’s just There. Summer weather is still here, which is very unusual for my corner of the planet, but SO welcome, especially as we had rotten summer weather for the majority of the actual summer months.

As always happens at Descent, memories as bittersweet as apple cider come back to me this year, and rip open wounds that haven’t entirely healed. I’m doing spiritual work both with the SOA (Gold Ray Quest) and with Sacred Mists in that I am preparing for the Journey into the Underworld that is this half of the Wheel. I can remember wondering last year when I’d EVER be done with the darned Underworld; my house of cards seemed to have crashed and burned and left me at Ground Zero several times; I realize that I NEVER will be.The Underworld and Descent are as necessary as Springtime and Emergence; they are all part of the larger Cycle, and need to exist in balance. It’s when we try to think of them as postive/negative or good/bad that we lose out (positive/negative in the good vs. bad sense, not the electrical charge…as in that case, pos/negative is accurate.); both forces are simply there. Necessary. Think of the attraction and repulsion that is in common, everyday magnets; we need both forces. They both make up the Universe. It’s when they fall out of Balance that we run into trouble. I see that now. My life, two years or so ago, was a carefully constructed, “pretty” house of cards. I feared the Underworld and tried to deny the shadow, and that caused things to shift out of balance, and leave me on my ass with nothing else but myself. But it was out of this that I carved out a new life, a more “real” one, and one that has blessed me in many different ways. I lost a lot of outer symbols of success, but gained a lot of inner ones, and a stronger compass and foundation to take me into the future. Those outer symbols can be built up and torn down easily. Look at the awesome and terrible power of a Hurricane or Tsunami: the richest and most beautiful buildings can be destroyed in a few seconds. But the power and strength that lies beneath them, in the earth, in human hearts and energy, stays there and grows.

Often, people seem to think of “bad” or negative things happening as “repayment” or as “punishment”. It’s not. It simply follows the rules of science. I’m a far cry from a scientist, but from my dimly recalled science lessons in high school, I know that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. I know that everything seeks a balance, and we have to take away or add to it in order for the scales to be equal. That’s all it is: the Universe is simply taking away and adding in response to where we are in terms of balance.

I’m finding it difficult to ground these days. I feel like I’m in the realm of spirit all the time rather than the realm of earth. I know I have to find, in my own words, balance between the two. Right now, though, the astral realm and those within it are so close, I have literally reached out and touched them.

When certain memories still sting and twist and hurt, or flood me with emotions, I know that these are ones I need to work on. But at the same time, I think that they will always be there. I just have to try to remember that, really, I can’t complain because I volunteered; many of these things, besides the ones that were the direct fault of others (i.e. child abuse), happened out of imbalance, or wrongful timing, or that was what my long-ago soul decided to learn this trip around. Serendipity has also been a good friend; I’m reading and uncovering info that I need very easily these days.

Bodiily? I’m exhausted. My intensive spiritual work is knocking me cold physically. I know that I have to try to even the scales at some point, but for right now, as the veil thins, I will try to ground and to work within these energies, as they happen for a reason.

Indeed, once we have crossed the Threshold of Initiation we can never turn back again..and I wouldn’t trade what I have learned and am learning on this beautiful path known as Priestesshood for all of the sunny days in the world. It’s worth it.


All-dewy Sky-sailing Pregnant Moon
who shines for all
who flows through all
light of the world which is yourself
maiden mother crone
the weaver the green one

Seed sower, grain reborn
Antered One come!
Bright sun, Dark death,
Lord of winds, lord of the dance
sun-child, winter born king
Hanged one
Untamed, untamed!
Stag and stallion, goat and bull,
sailor of the last sea, guardian of the gate
lord of the two lands
ever-dying, ever-living, radiance

-Starhawk