…as always, you are brilliant!!

The True Spirit of Halloween, for Real Witches

Halloween is here again. Pumpkins deck our porches and Witches in pointy hats swoop across the walls of classrooms and offices. Children accost one another, asking “What are you going to be for Halloween?” and grownups stock up on candy.

But for real Witches, Halloween has a deeper, spiritual meaning. Who are the real Witches? Those of us who practice the pre-Christian, nature and Goddess-centered spiritual traditions indigenous to Europe and the Middle East. For us, Halloween, or Samhain (pronounced Sau-in) to use the old Celtic term, is our New Year — the end of harvest in agricultural communities and therefore the beginning of the new cycle. At this time, we say that ‘the veil is thin’ that separates the seen from the unseen, the world of the living from the world of the dead. So this is the season when we honor the ancestors, mourn those who have died this year, and celebrate life.

Here in San Francisco, our Reclaiming tradition of Wicca (another term for the religion of the Witches) creates a big, public ritual, with art, music, poetry and dance weaving together to create sacred space. We name those who have died this year, and offer a chance for mourners to grieve with the support of our community. For us, death is a natural part of life. We acknowledge the sadness of our losses, but death itself is not something to fear. It’s simply one stage in the great cycles of birth, growth, death and rebirth that to us are sacred.

The heart of our ritual is the spiral dance, when over a thousand people dance together in a double spiral that symbolizes rebirth and regeneration. Moving together, passing one face after another, we enter together into a state of deep connection and ecstasy.

This year marks the Thirtieth Anniversary of our Spiral Dance ritual–and of the publication of my book, “The Spiral Dance: A Rebirth of the Ancient Religion of the Great Goddess.” In those years, our community has grown from a handful of us celebrating in our living rooms to an international network. Thirty years ago, information about Wicca and the Goddess was difficult to find and most Witches practiced in secrecy. Today, books, music, videos and networks abound — in part thanks to the internet. Wicca and our related Pagan traditions have begun to take the place they deserve among the spiritual traditions of the world.

So this Halloween, we urge you to take a break from the ghouls and the ghosts and learn something about real Witches. Below are links to my website, where you can find my books, including my latest, “The Last Wild Witch,” a picture book for young children published by Mother Tongue Ink, as well as many other resources. Enjoy, and may this season bring you comfort in grief, hope in sorrow, a strong vision for the future and the strength, support, and resources you need to act in service of what you love.

http://.starhawksblog.org/

On my blog for October 28 you will find many links to videos about Halloween and our Spiral Dance ritual.

www.reclaiming.org
Our website for our international network. Find classes, rituals and community contacts near you.

www.reclaimingspiraldance.org/
Information, history, pictures and videos from the Spiral Dance.

www.witchvox.com
Witches’ Voice–a great resource for general information on Wicca and Paganism.

BLESSED SAMHAIN/CALAN GAEF to all of my dear friends that celebrate it. I have so much to be thankful for this harvest, and you are all included in those thanks! May your new year be blessed by the Lord and Lady with brilliance and abundance!!

For all celebrating, have a safe and happy Halloween!

Namaste.

Upon Each Samhain

When you come I sense your presence
I put my hand out in the air
A moment, then, we stand united
Palm to palm while waiting there.
I miss you most upon each Samhain
When the boundary turns to sheer
We share these hours until the dawning
Then bid farewell until next year.

Once upon a time, when I was 14, I went to go have my cards read by a lady named Elvira. She had a little table set up at the shopping mall, and I’d seen her on a local cable access television show, eager and excited to peer into my future.

At 14, I was spellbound (no pun intended) by all things spiritual;I was a devout Catholic (at that time) who came from a long line of psychic, spiritual, strong and visionary women. I had access to a deep well of spiritual support and ideas. I’d been taught pretty much from birth by my mother and grandmother to do things like interpret dreams, bless homes, ask the saints for “favors” and to trust my psychic sight, which showed signs of emergence from a time too early for me to remember.

These women were all Catholics and would never DREAM of calling themselves witches (at least, the ones I knew or knew of), but that’s the best way to describe them. My mother always made me think of a country “root woman”; we would go to her first with any illness, and with the senses of a seasoned ER nurse in triage, she seemed to always know what to do. She knew whether it warranted a cup of tea or a trip to the doctor. She could brew up a “cure” in no time flat. She says this came from growing up poor and having to use things around the house to heal with as there was no money for anything else, but we knew it was more than that.

My Grandma also read tea leaves. She made you take the cup in your left hand, face it down, and turn it three times. She would then read amazing things in the cup, and show them to you, saying things like, “I see a big dog and a dollar bill in your path..don’t you see it?” All I saw was a clump of wet-looking tea leaves in the bottom of a cup, but Grandma saw visions and stories, and was usually right. We all loved the story of how she read tea leaves at a party and saw a red haired woman and a man in uniform in one of the women’s teacups there. The woman was infuriated and reamed out my grandmother and the people there, thinking they’d told her some gossip and were playing a joke on her, but Grandma insisted she knew nothing. After she stormed out, someone whispered to her that the woman’s husband, who was a firefighter or police officer( I can’t remember which) was having an affair with a red haired woman!

So, I grew up with this stuff. There was nothing strange about it for me. I didn’t realize that other people didn’t interpret their dreams, or that they weren’t believed when they had a psychic sixth sense or it was common knowledge that dead relatives came to talk to you, until I was older. The women of my family, a wonderful blend of Metis spirituality still exisiting in vestal memory and “superstitious” Catholics, where my first whispers to enter the world of witchcraft.

But I digress. Back to Elvira’s table. Elvira told me amazing things. She said that I would meet a boy over spring break, that he’d just broken up with his blond girlfriend who had given him a present made of glass. Being eager to meet a guy and have a “real boyfriend” and all that came with it at that age, I was ecstatic.

What was even more awe-inspiring is that it came true. Over spring break, I met up with a friend of a friend that I’d had a giant crush on and had drooled at across the pews at the church where I attended Mass. He had just broken up with a blonde girl, and when I asked him about a present made of glass, he jumped and said that she had given him a glass heart.

The relationship wasn’t much, of course. We met at the mall a few times and it was over in a few weeks, but she had been RIGHT! I felt a call to work with the Tarot, but was told it was “evil” and to “be careful”. The very same women that practiced superstitions I so admired told me that Tarot was different and from the devil. It confused and scared me, but I was still drawn to it.

I first picked up tarot cards when I was sixteen. I read the little booklet that came with them and tried to read them. I noticed right away that I didn’t really need the book. The meanings seemed to change for different people I read for. At first, it was just “playing” but it slowly evolved into a real practice.

At age 24, when I had my first Initiation into a now-dissolved coven, the High Priestess gave me an incredible tarot reading and told me that I had some real talent. She advised me to not even look at the books and to spend time meditating on each card. Being an impatient Leo, the idea of spending time meditating on each card sounded excruciating. But, I tried, I spent time picturing the major arcana and seeing them as “personalities”. Like most things a good High Priestess suggests, it was very helpful.

I continued my readings and people told me I was accurate most of the time. I found that Tarot was more like an “anchor” to help me to know more about the person and that random images would come to mind. At first, I wouldn’t say them as they sounded “silly”, but in time I realized that what might seem silly to me, would mean something to someone else, and to listen to my gut. Everything in a reading unfolds for a reason.

I now read the cards frequently just like Elvira did, for others (although I have no card table in the mall, or a TV show.) I find though that reading the cards for others normally isn’t like the cliches in movies, where the Gypsy woman, mysterious and darkly beautiful, reads people their fate in a deliciously creepy low voice. It becomes not so much about the cards, and more like spiritual counseling.

My background as a professional social worker comes in very handy. People normally aren’t just flocking to the fortune teller for kicks (Although some do, and that’s ok)..they are often coming with deep, searching questions that they are seeking. They are often looking for the counsel that the mundane world often doesn’t have; they’re seeking the same way that the ancient Greeks flocked to the Priestess at Delphi, wishing for guidance and counsel in their lives. It’s much more than just throwing the cards and telling someone what sign they are. People come looking for real direction and help. People all seem to remember, at some base quantum level, that they are spiritual beings on a human journey, and they are looking for ways to conenct with that spiritual self. We might just think that getting our cards done or having our astrological chart drawn,or even reading our daily horoscope, is just for fun. But I really think it’s a subconscious search for something deeper. We’re looking for what was once our birthright, stamped into our DNA. Once upon a time, people read the stars and the ocean and the land for answers. They went to see a wise woman for healing and wellness. If they needed counsel, a Priestess could show them what lay in front of them and help them to find their way. People lived in communities and relied on one another for wellness.

After the witchcraze in the 1400’s that swept most of Europe and the United States, the wise woman was silenced out of fear of what people didn’t understand, and due to the Church trying to amass property and put power in the hands of a few wealthy men. God wasn’t availiable through the land anymore; that was evil. God was a solemn, stern man with a beard that commanded people to live a certain way..or else. Doctors replaced the midwives and root women. Old spiritual practices such as the Beltane fires and planting crops according to the phase of the moon were considered silly superstitions from a simpler and less educated time. People moved “forward”, or at least they thought they did.

Progress marched on through the industrial era and so on and so on. Many gains were made for enhancing quality of life. People lived longer and were healthier. But, something else had been lost..the wisdom of the Old Ways. They were reduced to superstition and folk practices at best, and evil, dangerous deceptions of the devil at worst. People fought to forget their roots and it showed as the land grew more polluted and strained over time. Land was to be conquered, not to be honored.

But deep down, we remember. Deep down, we all yearn for answers. Jesus himself said to read the signs of the times in the land around us, contrary to what many fundamentalists will preach. People have forgotten to read the signs of the seasons and the land, to look for their answers in the stars. To see God within all things, not just in a building constructed by human beings.

I’m convinced people are led to what is now called “occult” out of a quest to reconnect to their old knowledge and wisdom that still speaks to them on some level, even if it whispers and is barely audible. I know that sometimes, in a flash of enlightenment, I see myself not as an ordinary tarot reader in jeans..but as a Priestess at Delphi, robed and veiled, reading and sharing the visions I have and helping people to perhaps begin to see the Old Ones again.

It’s a tremendous honor, and one that I don’t always feel worthy of. It’s not something that makes me “better” than anyone or more special; it’s simply part of who I am and what I am studying and learning constantly to become. I really think that I was meant to be a Priestess, the same way some were meant to be a doctor or a teacher. These are gifts that were handed to me from my genetics and that I am trying to hone into skills to help others. With every reading, I learn something myself…and feel more and more of a connection to those far away Priestesses, who sat on a clefted rock and spoke from the Goddess. They aren’t far away at all, if we learn to but listen to them in the echoes of the natural world all around us.

Namaste.

My Sister Priestess in the Sacred Mists wrote a beautiful piece in her journal about the topic of Initiation.
Today, we welcomed several of our brothers and sisters into the Priest/esshood of the Sacred Mists, as they Initiated to the First Degree. I offer them the warmest of congratulations and welcome them into the Coven and the Service of the Lord and Lady with all my heart.

Naturally, this started me thinking about Initiation and what this means to me, and what this means to the larger Wiccan community.

I think that there is a need to stress the seriousness and importance of what Initiation is and what it means. It is not simply a ritual to welcome someone into a group like joining a sorority or fraternity. It isn’t just being accepted by a coven, or awknowledging the end of a period of study with a ritual. It’s not like a convocation, either. Initiation is nothing less than crossing a spiritual threshold, pulling back a veil and moving to the other side, with no ability to turn back. It is taking a Sacred Oath to the Gods and Goddesses, and to all of the Universe. It is an unending bond between you and your coven mates. It pledges loyalty to your Tradition and a serious decision to walk that Tradition with honor, joy, honesty, and sincerity.

My first Initiation was at Ostara 2002. I had been studying with a group called Circle of the Goddess (COTG) via distance for over two years. In a brave and brazen (and risky, “crazy” as some said) move, I flew alone to the United States, something I had never done before, to be Initiated by Priest/esses that I had never met in person but had studied with intently for some time. I was to stay at the home of my High Priest and Priestess (Who were also a married couple) in Santa Clara, California, somewhere I had never been.

To say that those first steps beyond the curtain to Initiation was life shattering, deeply moving, profoundly emotional and filled with joy and reverence would be understatements. I cannot and will not ever divulge the secret rites that I went through during those miraculous days, but suffice to say, I was transformed.

Time passed, the group disbanded, and I was left feeling adrift and like I had no spiritual compass anymore. I started an eclectic circle which did not last long. I tried being a solitary, but something felt missing. I even tried to go back to the Catholic Church of my youth, as I was feeling like I didn’t know who or what I was anymore.That didn’t work, and I found myself longing for more direction and for a place that I truly felt would be my spiritual home.

But part of me remembered who I was, and what I was called to. I practiced again as a solitary and searched for the right tradition. I finally found what was to be my true spiritual home one autumn some five or six years ago now; The College of the Sacred Mists.

As I have mentioned several times on this blog, the Sacred Mists is home to me like none other; from the moment I was exploring the College, I *knew* in my heart that I had found my spiritual home and family, and that I wanted to be a part of the Tradition when I was able. A year and a day followed, a time where I grew closer to the Sacred Mists family and my desire to Initiate grew stronger. I grew and flourished as a Dedicant of the Sacred Mists.

When Initiation was offered, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I wanted to be a Priestess of the Sacred Mists. When I Initiated with several of my brothers and sisters of the Mists, it was the most pivotal experience spiritually for me; I had come home, I had drawn back the veil and seen the face of the Goddess, and felt honored, blessed, and deeply joyful to be a Priestess in this beautiful tradition.

I continued my study and service to the Tradition, and am now a Third Degree Dedicant. I know that when it is offered, my Second Degree Initiation will be an experience like none other. I take my responsibilities as a Priestess of the Sacred Mists very seriously, with reverence and awe. I see this as a calling to be a teacher, leader, and mentor to others. I’m honored to be accepted by and to be a part of this beautiful tradition that is truly my spiritual home and family.

As it says in one of my favorite quotes from “The Mists of Avalon”, which the title of this blog comes from;

“How do you write of the making of a priestess? What is not obvious is secret. Those who have walked that road will know, and those who have not will never know though I should write down all the forbidden things.”

Being a Priestess is something that you become and that you are. It is not a “job” where you turn out the lights, lock the door, and head home at the end of the day. You are a Priestess 24/7. Being a Priestess becomes as much a part of you as your backbone is. You are one that serves the Gods, that teaches and is a mentor to others. Most of all, you are one that has agreed to take on every experience in life. Phyllis Curott, a well-known Wiccan High Priestess and author, says in her book “Book of Shadows” that a shaman is like a wounded healer; you can’t learn to heal others until you’ve learned to heal yourself.

To me, this says that we will go through many trials. And I have, and will, and I have the knowledge that they are all sent to craft me to Her service. In the myth of the descent of Inanna, She has to get rid of all the external trappings that are important to her: clothing, jewels, and prestige, in order to become a Queen. So must we. Our spiritual studies mirror what unfolds in our lives, and vice versa..it is all connected. That is why it is such a serious and important decision to be Initiated; we will be changed forever, and there will be many joys but also many challenges.

I know that a Priestess is what I was born to be, what I have been created for. I remember a Priest at my first Initiation said; “With every step your feet kiss the Mother Earth. Make every step count.”

I shall try, for the honor and joy of the God and Goddess, and for the Sacred Mists Tradition that I love so dearly.

….I love my new Twitter account, but I’m not going to allow my two-second tweets to take over my blog. This week, I’ve just been very reflective and “inward” to the point where writing is difficult. But I shall try.

The veil is thinning the more we move towards Samhain. I can feel autumn coming all around me, and the physical signs are here; the other day when I went for a walk, the leaves were crunching under my feet, and were beautiful colors of gold and burnished auburn. The wind is starting to blow cooler, the night temperatures are dipping. We had a rare late summer here. I live on the Canadian prairies, so winter often comes very early here, with a brief fall in between. It’s never long enough for me. I’m a summer girl through and through, but I do love the fall; I love the colors, the wind, the falling leaves, sweaters, anything pumpkin..but it’s always over too quickly, and the winter snow sometimes is with us before Samhain (everyone here remembers at least one Halloween where their costume had to be worn over a snowsuit, and they are typically purchased to accomodate one.). So, the fall is brief.

But I think that, like all things in nature, there’s a lesson to be learned from this.

I remember when I had the good fortune to go to the Mayan Riviera in Mexico, one January years ago. Every day I was there, I kept thinking of how I had to make it last. How when I got home, it was going to be -30 Temps with snowbanks up to my hips. When I lay in a hammock on the most beautiful beach I’d ever seen, I was dreading the fact that in a couple more days I would be heading back home, back to university, my practicum and my part-time job. Back to stress. Back to “real life”.

The problem is that the whole time I wasn’t fully there. I was somewhere else. Instead of enjoying the moment, I kept thinking about what would happen when it ended.

Being someone that struggles with anxiety disorder, that is par for the course with the way my mind works. Or, rather, wants to work.

But am I at the mercy of that? No. Wicca has helped me to see that there are ways to change your thinking. Dion Fortune defined magick as the act of changing your consciousness at will. That’s where the magick starts; within our thinking. The law of attraction isn’t some fancy, new agey concept that will cost you hundreds, or even thousands, of dollars in books, CD’s, meditation tapes, and seminars; those things can help, but when you want to make real magick, you can start right now. Change your outlook, change your thinking..even if it’s one thought a day.

A fellow Priestess and dearfriend of mine taught me the following trick; be in the moment. Right in the moment. Don’t think even a second ahead. Just now.

Go ahead, try it. I’ll wait.

Not easy,is it? I try to do this at least once a day. Think only of NOW. That’s it. You’ll be surprised how your perception will shift. I’m going to keep trying, too; when I look at the changing leaves and feel the cold,crisp wind blowing, I’m going to think of autumn and not the winter to come. It may be brief, but it’s arguably approaching the most sacred time of year for Witches, when the veil is thinnest, when the living and the dead can almost touch hands , when time and space doesn’t exist…a time of such sensitivity that even the Muggles can feel it. I love Samhain, it’s my favorite sabbat and time of the year, and I’m going to try to enjoy that window in time, before it is frosted with ice and snow.

Namaste, be well!

..from my last post, as my brain does not appear to wish to be quiet at any point. I’m having the urge to write, and honoring it, as well as enjoying the free-flow of my thoughts into the written word, as it isn’t always so simple.

A little more thoughts on Descent and Mabon, as I dream out loud..

My dreams are becoming so very vivid lately that I’m not sleeping…I’m (astral) travelling. This time of year is very poignant for me and I can feel the veil thinning as surely as I can feel my pulse; it’s a fact, it’s just There. Summer weather is still here, which is very unusual for my corner of the planet, but SO welcome, especially as we had rotten summer weather for the majority of the actual summer months.

As always happens at Descent, memories as bittersweet as apple cider come back to me this year, and rip open wounds that haven’t entirely healed. I’m doing spiritual work both with the SOA (Gold Ray Quest) and with Sacred Mists in that I am preparing for the Journey into the Underworld that is this half of the Wheel. I can remember wondering last year when I’d EVER be done with the darned Underworld; my house of cards seemed to have crashed and burned and left me at Ground Zero several times; I realize that I NEVER will be.The Underworld and Descent are as necessary as Springtime and Emergence; they are all part of the larger Cycle, and need to exist in balance. It’s when we try to think of them as postive/negative or good/bad that we lose out (positive/negative in the good vs. bad sense, not the electrical charge…as in that case, pos/negative is accurate.); both forces are simply there. Necessary. Think of the attraction and repulsion that is in common, everyday magnets; we need both forces. They both make up the Universe. It’s when they fall out of Balance that we run into trouble. I see that now. My life, two years or so ago, was a carefully constructed, “pretty” house of cards. I feared the Underworld and tried to deny the shadow, and that caused things to shift out of balance, and leave me on my ass with nothing else but myself. But it was out of this that I carved out a new life, a more “real” one, and one that has blessed me in many different ways. I lost a lot of outer symbols of success, but gained a lot of inner ones, and a stronger compass and foundation to take me into the future. Those outer symbols can be built up and torn down easily. Look at the awesome and terrible power of a Hurricane or Tsunami: the richest and most beautiful buildings can be destroyed in a few seconds. But the power and strength that lies beneath them, in the earth, in human hearts and energy, stays there and grows.

Often, people seem to think of “bad” or negative things happening as “repayment” or as “punishment”. It’s not. It simply follows the rules of science. I’m a far cry from a scientist, but from my dimly recalled science lessons in high school, I know that for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. I know that everything seeks a balance, and we have to take away or add to it in order for the scales to be equal. That’s all it is: the Universe is simply taking away and adding in response to where we are in terms of balance.

I’m finding it difficult to ground these days. I feel like I’m in the realm of spirit all the time rather than the realm of earth. I know I have to find, in my own words, balance between the two. Right now, though, the astral realm and those within it are so close, I have literally reached out and touched them.

When certain memories still sting and twist and hurt, or flood me with emotions, I know that these are ones I need to work on. But at the same time, I think that they will always be there. I just have to try to remember that, really, I can’t complain because I volunteered; many of these things, besides the ones that were the direct fault of others (i.e. child abuse), happened out of imbalance, or wrongful timing, or that was what my long-ago soul decided to learn this trip around. Serendipity has also been a good friend; I’m reading and uncovering info that I need very easily these days.

Bodiily? I’m exhausted. My intensive spiritual work is knocking me cold physically. I know that I have to try to even the scales at some point, but for right now, as the veil thins, I will try to ground and to work within these energies, as they happen for a reason.

Indeed, once we have crossed the Threshold of Initiation we can never turn back again..and I wouldn’t trade what I have learned and am learning on this beautiful path known as Priestesshood for all of the sunny days in the world. It’s worth it.


All-dewy Sky-sailing Pregnant Moon
who shines for all
who flows through all
light of the world which is yourself
maiden mother crone
the weaver the green one