Archive for April, 2010

Growth…knocks the wind out of you.

As I continue walking my path and my journey through this life, there are things that steal my breath away.  There are moments that I see my path laid out before me and then I trip suddenly on some kind of stump, branch or boulder that has been placed in my path.

As I undergo such moments, my grace leaves me and I clumsily stumbe through my path and through life in general. You can look around trying to find something to hold onto, anything to pull you up out of the dirt that you have fallen into.  It is generally in these moments that you discover that you have a great strength and as you flail through whatever lesson it is you are working on right at that moment, you are no longer alone help comes from a place you do not expect it to.  You find solace in the fact that you can get up and carry on despite the torrent of weather which has uprooted you.

In finding the strength to get up time and time again you show an amazing resilience and desire to overcome the odds.  You work through whatever issues and problems crop up and become a stronger person.  As I mentioned earlier I undergo these types of lessons more often than I would like, though I understand the need for the lesson, I do not care for the pain at the time.  Afterall what do you do when you are confronted with, for example, some bit of drama from an angle you could never expect and from someone you considered your friend.  You could do a couple things, you could walk away from the friendship, you could repair it, you could change it, or you can pretend the problem does not exist.  Which of these do you think is harder?

It truly does not matter which is harder as they are all difficult in their own rights and leave a mark on your heart.  Working through them to come out on the otherside is amazing.
It becomes a ray of sunshine, a fresh spring rain that has cleared the air.  It becomes a place for you to reflect and grow in some rather amazing ways.  Cleansing the spirit leaving invigoration and joy in it’s place.  As I look back at my own moments of graceless stumbling I see many things.  I see perseverance, determination to reach the other-side without giving up.  I FEEL elated that in never giving up, I learned something that I otherwise would not have learned.  I find friends standing by my side ready to hug me and it steals my breath away.

How does one person become so lucky in life that they are able to push and pull through lessons?  It is through the strength of spirit and the Blessings of my Path that I find my way and my luck through this life.

I am Wiccan.  I am Witch.  I am Priestess.  I am.

Holding my head a little higher each day, anchored in my own self-worth I find joy where there may be none, I find beauty in the world around me.  When I am confronted with the ugly of the world…I try harder to see the beauty.  It does not always work, I get frustrated, I go home and try again another day.

Posted on 7 April '10 by , under Growth, Life, Spirituality. No Comments.

From the past…

Today I am feeling…like honoring my past.  Perhaps I am a little melancholy for some of the ways things ahve worked out.  Perhaps it is because my birthday is around the corner or perhaps becasue I am back in touch with a couple of people.

Growing up in the FL Keys I was a good girl.  I was one of the ones that teachers always loved becuase my nose was always in this book or that book.  I did not have a slew of friends but I was friendly with nearly everyone that I knew.  Always the odd bird for one reason or anohter.  I was the girl that was a little squishy and overweight.  I smiled a lot, I laughed a lot.

My best friend was this girl named Joy.  I thought we’d be BFF.  Our lives went different ways than either one of us could have imagined.  For a good long time our lives continued to walk along a path that was side by side as we experienced nearly the same things as the other, though we were not in touch.  After a time this synchronicity of path ceased to exist and ultimately our friendship ended.  It was not a good time nor a good parting but one of misunderstandings and hurt feelings.

Fast forward many years down the road.  We are in touch again only barely via online mediums such as facebook.  We are both very different people than we once were and this is not a bad thing at all.  We are starting to feel around the limits of our friendship again and truthfully I hope we are able to re-kindle some of the connection that we long ago severed.

How does this all tie into my path?  I am still figuring that out; however, I feel the connections of the past surfacing and wanting to be acknowledged instead of denied.  It is not that I am ashamed of my past, hiding from my past or anything like that.  I just don’t dwell on it.  My past shaped a large part of who I have become.  By overcoming adversity, by finding a spiritual path that I identified with so deeply, by living through the things I lived through, I became a better student.  I became a better Priestes, I became me.

It’s hard somedays to remember the long road I have taken to get where I am today.  I am wealthy in love and spirit.  I have moments of doubt, pain and depression like most people do.  I simply claw myself away from the emotions that would harm my spirit.  I’ve never believed in hiding this from students.  In order to be a good teacher you must be able to teach and be taught at the same time.  The students at Sacred Mists definitely teach me.  They inspire me to do better for them.  They deserve a safe community, a quality Spiritual Education, leaders they can trust.

In order to provide this for them we have to be willing to accept our past, learn from it and apply those lessons.  So today, I honor my past.

I grew up in the FL Keys.
Daughter to Ken & Patti – A Cement Truck Driver & Maid/Retail
Friend to few, Acquaintence to many at Coral Shores
Friend to Joy, Eva, Terra, Sheri, Iris, Anna,  Nereda, Eric, Jessica, Jahala, Judy, Bret, Rob, Squeaky, Ana, Jason, Jeremy- who all taught me joy and friendship as they came and went in my life (and those not mentioned I honor you for your places in my past)
As easy to befriend as I am to be forgotten
Fiance of Darral – who taught me how to not hide
Friend to Darren – who gave me confidence to leave Darral
Priestess under Jim – who gave me a safe Coven until his untimely death
Homeless yet full-time worker who lived on the graciousness of her friends as a Gypsy until she could move home
Wife to Keith who taught me what Love really is
Priestess, Soul Sister & Friend to Lady Raven – who teaches me continually by action and example what it means to be a High Priestess
Priestess & Friend to all in Sacred Mists – May our paths continue to grow and evolve together over the many years to come

From the past I look forward to the future.

Posted on 6 April '10 by , under Growth, Life, Spirituality. No Comments.

What does it take…

More and more lately I am seeing a rash bit of consumerism and fast-food mentality in my precious communities that I am a part of for my very spiritual nature.  What do I mean by this?  I see people expecting to go from neophyte to High Priestess in record time.  I see people not understanding what it means to be a Priestess and the work that is involved in it.  You can’t throw money and bullshit at this and expect to succeed.

In my own past I have been a leader in a now defunct (due to death) coven, taken and participated actively in many workshops.  I have been a member of a Progressive Coven for 8 years and an Initiate for 7 of those 8 years.

Currently I am working on my 3rd Degree with Sacred Mists, the previously mentioned Progressive Coven.  This journey that I am on is one that I must be fully engaged in the daily activities of my path, the students and my Coven as a whole.  I have been engaged in the lessons of the Third Degree for 5 years now.  This has been a very long leg of this life journey.  I know in my heart I will never be complete with.

Where is this going?  To be quite frank, do not expect to go from 1-HP in 3 years.  It’s not going to happen.  Each Tradition requires a minimum timeframethat will vary that you must be in a given degree.  Our minimum is 1 year and one day before you can move into the next degree.  The Third Degree is all about two major themes.  Introspective work and Extrovert work.  These seem to be polar opposites and at odds with each other endlessly.  How do you do deep and meaningful introspection yet still be outgoing and actively participating.  The balance of the two is not easy and it’s a tight-rope to be sure.

In order to be a High Priestess, I feel I need to be able to handle any and every situation that may come up in a Coven.  From Teaching to Personality conflict & resolution to Mentoring and Guiding.  This is a LOT of hard work.  I have done much of this in my years prior to joining Sacred Mists; however, my experiences with Sacred Mists have fine tuned the knowledge that I already have.  It has given the knowledge the shape of wisdom and grace under fire.

I did not expect that the gifts given to me would be easy.  I did not expect that I would be handed a degree that was simply a title.  I expected to work my tail off to prove to my High Priestess that I know what I am doing and can do this.  I expected to face my shadow and my light.  I received what I expected in spades. *laugh*

I will be the first 3rd Degree Initiate of Sacred Mists since we have gone online.  There were several before Sacred Mists was brought online.  I will be the first.  I feel this leg of my journey closing and I see the port of call ahead.  My next step?  I will find and focus on an Adept Course.  I will continue to learn and teach.  I will be the Priestess I am meant to be in this life.

It takes drive, a will to succeed and a lot of hard work to come out on the other side of the Third Degree.  Being a High Priestess is not easy work.  It is filled with joy, sorrow, drama, love and laughter.  You get to see the best and the worst of those in your Coven.  Build and Grow and Evolve your Coven into the next step.  It’s an amazing journey.

Posted on 3 April '10 by , under Growth, Sacred Mists, Training, Wicca. 7 Comments.