I know I am not alone in this, but I remember 9/11/01 as if it happened today.
I had just gotten in my car and was backing out of my driveway when I heard them talking about an explosion, or something of the sort, at the World Trade Center. It all sounded so…War of the Worlds. I listened in a state of “This has GOT to be a joke” kind of shock on my short drive to work.
I entered the store where I worked at the time, and I heard someone say “Now they’ve hit the Pentagon!”. I wandered through the store towards the break-room to put my lunch away and get some coffee. I felt as though I was dreaming, there was a buzzing almost whirring around in my head, like white noise. And then…
I stepped into the break-room. The TV was on and it was angled directly where I stood. The moment I entered the room, I watched in disbelief as the first tower crumbled to the ground like the ashes of pne of my Grandmother’s long neglected cigarette.
I was frozen. I dropped my lunch bag on the floor and just stared at the screen in shock, horror, disbelief, and any number of other words that all seem to fall short of the emotions I was feeling. I was crying, my head was reeling…I have no idea how I stayed standing.
I know now, that the reason I was so distraught (moreso than most of my co-workers) is because I am an empath. I did not know that at the time ,however, therefore I was completely without any form of shield. I was his full force in the face with the fear, desperation, shock, pain & terror that those in and around the WTC were experiencing. I hope to never have to feel anything like it again in this, or any other, lifetime.
I truly do not know how we made it through the day…well, it was helpful that very few people felt the need to spend the day shopping. I must admit, I was thoroughly annoyed by those who did. We were all afraid, do we pull our kids out of school? Will there be more attacks? The questions were endless, our minds were frantic. I was heartbroken.
To this day, 8 years later, I cannot watch the footage. No amount of shielding can keep the feelings at bay. I would have to actually wall off a part of myself and my memories to stop the pain, and I am not willing to do that. As painful as the memories are, their pain and fear and courage live somewhere within me. To shut it down would be to dishonor them all, both victims and heroes. I will Never Forget.
Some wish vengance, I wish for Peace. We must learn and practice tolerance. If the human race is to continue to survive, we MUST stop the hatred.
So, on this day, 8 years later, I send prayers of Peace and Love to the Universe. May the souls of those who perished be at peace, and may their loved ones find comfort. So Mote it Be.